Not to freedom from debt however. We are ALMOST there. Close enough to sleep at night. No, the countdown I’m referring to is one we’ve been (not so) patiently waiting for for a very long time.
We’ve been seeing a fertility specialist since July. After 3 failed rounds of clomid, this is our first cycle with gonal injections. It is VERY expensive. But… tomorrow i will ovulate. And it will finally be possible for us to conceive our first child. I’m so nervous/excited/anxious/weepy all at the same time that i’m not quite sure what to feel. I feel like I could just spontaneously burst out of my skin at any second. We are fully aware that the chances of successful conception is the same as a normal pregnancy, however it is possible. The first possibility. Ever. I really really really want to get my hopes up and think this is it. It is very very hard to keep convincing myself it may not happen. I’m all over the map. Not quite sure how else to express my feelings, other than i really really really really really really really hope this works! Nothing would make us happier than to announce the impending arrival of the first grandchild to my parents for Christmas. We need this. They need this. We all eagerly await this child. I hope and pray that we are able to conceive… this week! These past 2 weeks have already been the longest 2 weeks of my life. Self injections every night, remembering to take medications morning noon and night, blood test every other day, and ultrasounds…. The next 2 weeks are going to be an eternity…. Please Lord, with all of my heart and soul I pray that we are able to conceive a healthy child with this cycle.